


no lies, no sins

by sansonrio



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst, Brief mention of Ursa Iroh and Lu Ten, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, One Shot, Ozai (Avatar) is an Asshole, Short One Shot, Wordcount: 500-1.000, Zuko (Avatar) Deserves Nice Things, Zuko (Avatar)-centric, sorry sadness is all i can offer, this is not a happy story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:15:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26551222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sansonrio/pseuds/sansonrio
Summary: Zuko can't have this.He'll learn, eventually– he always does.
Relationships: Sokka & Zuko (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), The Gaang & Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 163





	no lies, no sins

It’s been a year since the end of the war.

Zuko remembers his father, not for kind words and the loving touch of a hand, but for cold, unyielding stone once pressed into his knees. On good days, he can pull his hair into a traditional knot without the helpful guide of a mirror; on the bad, he sits in his mother’s garden, letting his servant’s careful hands make quick work of it. 

There are more bad days than good, it seems.

He hasn’t been afforded the luxury of peace, and with Ozai still alive, deep beneath the ground in some earth kingdom cell, he’s not sure he ever will be. The mark of his father, branded into his skin; a lesson forever learned. 

–

He doesn’t talk about the war.

The palace is numbing, empty even through the steady flow of servants around him. Zuko doesn’t think much about his childhood, but even then, he had Azula, Mother, Uncle. Lu Ten, once. He takes meals in his study. Tea by the pond.

Not for the first time, Zuko wishes his uncle had stayed.

–

It’s been a year since the end of the war, and Zuko turns eighteen.

He wakes before dawn, tired enough to fall back asleep, awake enough to make sense of the shadows in his room. Thousands of miles away, Ozai’s grip on the Fire Nation has not let up. Another lesson, learnt at his father’s hand. 

Zuko does not let news of the attempt escape the palace.

Celebrations begin throughout Caldera. Lanterns line the city streets, casting a soft glow on the growing crowds below as night falls. The people dance in ways Zuko’s never seen, and a part of him hopes for his country. The Fire Nation, healing with the rest of the world. 

He thinks Azula would have loved it for what it could be, not for what it was.

–

A year has passed since the war ended.

Peace talks between the nations will continue for decades to come One hundred years is not easily forgotten. Zuko will not let himself forget.

When news of the Avatar arriving reaches the palace, Zuko is… surprised.

His guards stiffen as he’s ambushed by a group of teenagers; Zuko waves them off with a laugh and allows himself to sink into their hugs. It’s no easier to admit missing his friends than it was saying goodbye the first time, so Zuko offers whatever hospitality he can instead.

He’s whisked away, some meeting with his generals, but promises to join them that evening. 

–

It’s jarring, to be in the extravagant dining hall after refusing to use it.

Zuko remembers how it used to feel, he beside his mother with Azula across, and, of course, his father at the head of the table. Dinners were particularly awful as his sister bragged about her training, so many steps ahead of himself yet several years younger. Zuko had corrected Azula only once; Ozai taught him another lesson.

Only Mother had ever asked about Zuko and, in time, he became grateful for it. 

Zuko hates this room. He sees Ozai in his place and hates himself.

They spend hours there, though, telling each other of a year’s worth of tales and travels. Zuko smiles dopily at his friends, proud of how far they’ve all come, amazed they wanted to come to his home in the first place. 

The table bursts with sudden laughter, the sound so genuine Zuko ducks his head to hide the sudden heat in his eyes. He looks up when Toph punches him in the arm; she smirks, Dork, and Zuko can’t help but chuckle when she does it again. 

He doesn’t ask how long they’ll stay.

–

Sokka drapes an arm across Zuko’s shoulders as they leave the room, faces flushed from drinking.

 _Missed you, man_ , Sokka says, so casually Zuko turns his face away, sure his cheeks are embarrassingly red. _I mean– we all did, but. Yeah._

Zuko sees Sokka smiling at him out of the corner of his eye.

_I missed you, too._

–

He can’t sleep that night.

Zuko winds the path to his mother’s garden, serene under the moon.

–

 _It gets lonely, on the sea_ , Sokka tells him later, his own restlessness leading him down the same path. _You look out and all you see is the moon and stars. You just feel so– so–_

 _Small_ , Zuko whispers, nods; he understands. _Yeah. I get it._

A moment passes. Sokka nudges him with a shoulder, face unreadable. _Three years is a long time._

_It is_ , says Zuko. His breath catches when Sokka frowns. _A year is a long time, too._

There’s a quiet buzzing somewhere behind Zuko. His hand twitches in his lap.

Sokka looks away, to the water gently rippling on the pond, then up; half-crescents reflect in his eyes, and Zuko remembers. 

_It is_ , Sokka says, finally, so quiet from where he sits beside Zuko that Zuko thinks he might have imagined it. They stay there, silence heavy, thick enough Zuko feels like he’s choking. Sokka’s hand rests in the grass between them, and if he moves his own, just an inch, then maybe…

But Zuko can’t have this. He knows he can't, yet still he tries?

He’ll learn, eventually– he always does.

**Author's Note:**

> be emo about zukka with me on tumblr: rahshala


End file.
